


When You Said Kiss Me, I Asked How Hard

by TheOrgasmicSeke



Category: Homestuck
Genre: 30fordirty, Alternate Universe, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Flirting, Awkward Teenage Babies, Awkward all around, Awkward situations, Catholic Character, Christmas, Christmas Party, High School, Humanstuck, Kisses, M/M, Making Out, Mixed Race Kankri, Parties, Sexual Inexperience, Sexually Naive Kankri, Soft Kisses, Strangers to Friends, Teenagers, White Boy Dirk, or more, talk of masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 11:18:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4433474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOrgasmicSeke/pseuds/TheOrgasmicSeke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>30forDirty. The insanely popular game among teenagers where at random, two names are picked from a jar and then those two teens are locked in a room together for thirty minutes! What happens behind closed doors, stays behind closed doors.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When You Said Kiss Me, I Asked How Hard

**Author's Note:**

> First off I just want to say that I made up 30forDirty( a variation of second minutes in heaven but way longer) and I suggest as underage teenagers this is not something you should do for fun. Disclaimer all over the fucking place okay. 
> 
> My Rarepair otp. I'm going to write a lot for you. You watch me. 
> 
> Underage tag because they're like 17 and that's technically still underage. 
> 
> Enjoy!!

Roxy Lalonde parties were known as the best parties around. There was something special about them that all of Westwood High knew all about. Roxy was one of those lucky rich girls whose parents didn't seem to give a fuck what she did as long as she kept her grades up and didn't get arrested. Luckily for them, Roxy was a smart girl. She didn't need their constant eyes over her shoulder to live a good healthy life.

And that's why her parties were known throughout the school.

She threw the best parties without the need of alcohol or drugs. The petite blonde insisted no one drink at her parties since they were all underage but they didn't need the alcohol to have fun anyway. She had good music, great games, and great food. She prided herself on her ability to throw the best parties and the annual mid-term Christmas blast was something everyone had been looking forward to for a while.

Mid-terms sucked. Especially for Juniors like them. They didn't have it as bad as the seniors but they still had the pressure of getting good grades for colleges in the future and after mid-terms, everyone was ready for a good party and Roxy was happy to provide. Considering Mid-terms had been the week before Christmas break, everyone was more than ready for a good Christmas party to relax before they had to deal with their families.

By the time Dirk Strider arrived to the Lalonde mansion, the party was in full swing with pumping music and teenagers everywhere. The entire junior class had been invited which counted to over a hundred people but Roxy's basement was a huge place with as much space as they could possibly need. She took the time to decorate the place with streamers, balloons, twinkle lights, and little beautifully decorated Christmas trees scattered all about. And once Dirk was spotted by her, moving around a decorated tree to avoid bumping into someone, he had her attention.

She shoved a drink in his hands, pointed about at all the food options, planted a kiss to his cheek and then set off to greet more of her guests. She was always a bit of a whirlwind but they'd been friends since second grade so Dirk was pretty used to it. He just settled himself down on one of the comfortable couches spread about and enjoyed his favorite past time. People watching.

Music thumped through the speakers set about all over the large room while people lumbered in groups, chatting and dancing while everyone waited for Roxy to really start the party. It wouldn't be a Roxy party without one of her infamous games that always ended in someone getting laid. Dirk wasn't one to participate in those types of games but he always found some amusement in watching the people who did. Especially in the aftermath, trying to hid the obvious hickeys and messed up hair. It was entertaining.

Dirk wasn't entirely sure what Roxy had handed him to drink but it tasted suspiciously like eggnog and he wondered if she had given up her "no-alcohol" rule for the sake of Christmas. He pushed a bit of the liquid around in his mouth for a moment before he swallowed and decided that no, it wasn't spiked. Good. He didn't have any intentions of getting drunk off his ass that night. He just wanted to enjoy the company of his friends and the music that thumped through his veins.

By the time Roxy called the room to attention, Dirk was curled up comfortably on the couch with cute little Jake English at his side, rambling on about some new video game they both planned to buy once it was released.

"Alright dolls and gents!" Roxy called, gaining attention as the music was turned down by her best friend Jane. Her face was flushed slightly and her beautiful blue eyes flickered over the room as she cradled a large jar to her chest. She popped a hip out to one side and flicked perfectly curled blonde hair over her shoulder as she smacked her plump lips. "If you didn't put your name in for 30forDirty than too late!" She grinned, giggling slightly as she gave Jane, the shorter raven haired girl at her side, a nudge. "It's time to pull names! We have three rooms." She shifted the jar full of strips of paper to one hand as she held up three fingers. "So three pairs first and after thirty minutes are up we'll pick the next three!"

There was some mumbling among the party-goers and Dirk's attention was draw to Jake who dug his fingers into the sleeve of the blond's white shirt.

"Are you joining?" Jake asked, green eyes curious.

"Nah." Dirk shrugged and tipped his cup to take another swallow of his drink. "Not really my kinda thing."

"What is 30forDirty exactly?"

"Pretty much what it sounds like." A smirk curled to his lips as dark eyes glanced over to the group hovering around Roxy near the snack table. "It's funny to see who gets paired up though."

"It's random?"

"Names pulled from a jar. Yeah, watch." Dirk sat up a bit more, tapping Jake's hand on his arm to motion toward Roxy.

"Alright! First name!" Roxy dug her perfectly manicured hand into the jar, swished the pieces of paper around for a minute and then grabbed onto one, pulling it out. A grin was on her face as she unfolded the piece of paper and bounced in her way-too-high-heels. "Lindsay T.!"

Dirk watched in amusement as a flushed redhead stepped forward, squaring her shoulders as she was pushed toward Roxy thanks to a few of her friends. Roxy gave the girl a pretty smile before turning back to the jar to pick another name.

"Micheal J.!"

There was a bit of movement from one corner of the room and a few whistles as a short gruff looking boy stepped forward, a slight scowl on his face but his cheeks flushed as he stepped up next to Lindsay. Roxy gave them each a pat on the shoulder before she moved back to the jar she had sat on the snack table.

"Pair two!" Roxy wiggled as she plucked out a piece of paper between her nails and when she unfolded it, her eyes took on a twinkle. The grin that curled to her lips was anything but innocent as her eyes plucked up over the crowd until they landed on Dirk whose heart about stopped. "Dirk S.!"

Yup, heart. That was in his stomach. Jake shook his arm slightly, snapping him from his daze. "I thought you didn't join?"

"I didn't."

Roxy dropped the slice of paper onto the table before she skipped over to Dirk, crossing the distance rather quickly. "Come on, honey." She grabbed onto his hands and tugged the male to his feet.

"Roxy-"

"Shh Shh just enjoy it." She gave him a wink and that was all Dirk needed to know.

She set him up. He frowned slightly but allowed her to pull him over to the group. Once he was free of her tugging he stuffed his hands in his pockets and bunched up his shoulders, hoping to just disappear right then and there. Dirk hated awkward situations and he was sure he was about to be thrown into one. Jake was giving him double thumbs up from the couch but that didn't make the tall blond feel any better.

"Okay! And Dirk gets paired up with..." Roxy trailed off as she dipped her hand in the jar to pull out another piece of paper. She tilted her head at what she read on the paper and glanced over to the side before a smile came to her lips. "Okay right, Kankri V.!"

There was a series of whistles and whoops from a group Dirk was slightly familiar with. He watched, a nervousness in his chest, as the dirty blond skater boy known as Mituna pushed a short, plump boy out from their group. The boy faltered slightly and the glare he shot Mituna was enough to set anyone's balls on fire. But Mituna mumbled something to him, a smirk on his lips before giving his arm another push. Kankri, so Dirk assumed was his name, stood up straight and marched across the room to join Dirk.

Roxy grinned and turned back to the jar to call the next pairing but Dirk wasn't listening anymore. He found himself staring at the boy a foot away from him. Kankri. His name was Kankri. He was short, probably just over five feet which made Dirk tower over him at his height of nearly six foot. His hips were rounded, almost like a girls but not in a bad way. Kinda plump and nice. He stood up straight, his arms crossed over his chest and though he looked angry, Dirk noticed he was shaking. His hands were clutching tight to his biceps and he was hugging himself, his naturally tanned cheeks darkened with a blush as his teeth tugged at his bottom lip. He wasn't even looking at Dirk. If anything, he was acting like the tall blond didn't even exist.

Dirk swallowed hard and let out a soft sigh from his nose as he glanced away to Roxy. Great. Talk about awkward. What the hell was he supposed to do? He had no idea who Kankri was and by the look of it, Kankri was happy to keep it that way. What a great next thirty minutes he was going to have.

"Alright! Now, you three pairs, follow me and Janey!" Roxy tapped a finger to her nose as she spun around, slipping her arm with Jane's so they could led the way.

The two other pairs took off first and when Dirk made to follow, he noticed Kankri hadn't moved at all. He wasn't sure what to say. He thought to tell the guy he didn't have to do it and just as he was about to open his mouth and say exactly that, Kankri twisted on his toes and followed after the group. Dirk watched him for a moment, following the lines of his legs in those exceptionally tight pants before he snapped himself out of it and quickly followed after.

The room Roxy led them to was clean and sparse. There was a lamp, a small dresser and a bed. It was a guest room, obviously and when Roxy gave Dirk a smirk as she passed them to disappear down the hallway, he made a mental note to pay her back soon. He let out a sigh at the open door and when he glanced to Kankri, the boy's eyes were locked on the bed. Dirk glanced up, checking down the hallway to see they were alone. The other pairs were in their rooms doing whatever it was they wanted to do.

"Look you-" Dirk cut off when Kankri stepped into the room and stood off to the side, keeping his arms around himself in a tight hug. "Alright then." The blond sighed again and entered the room, shutting the door behind them. He shifted on his feet for a few minutes awkwardly before he decided sitting on the edge of the bed was a good idea. It was a comfortable at least.

Dirk took his time in glancing around the room as they sat there in silence. The soft thumping of the music from the main room could be heard but that was about it. He found he could only stare at the sky blue wallpaper for so long before his vision went fuzzy. Fuck, he hated awkward situations like this. He didn't know what to say or what to do and Kankri seemed more than happy to stand there for the next thirty minutes. Which was fine. Dirk could deal with that. Just cause the dude was cute was no reason for them to  _do_ anything that was expected of them.

And  _fuck_  was he cute. Dirk found his eyes drawn back to the dusty skinned male standing in the corner, his eyes fully focused on the floor. Those eyes were a color Dirk couldn't see from where he was. They were a bit large for Kankri's face but they fit well and were fanned with thick long black lashes that made him... Well he was pretty. Like really pretty. With his dark skin, freckles dusting along his nose and cheeks and dark wavy hair that framed his round face perfectly. He wore a brightly red sweater that was probably two sizes too big for him and hung about halfway down his thighs but the color looked really good on him. And  _those pants_. Dark in color and too tight to leave anything to the imagination. How could Dirk think he wasn't cute? The boy was cute. Enough said. Button nose, doe eyes, plump lips and thick hips. Yeah. Dirk was a little fucked.

"So..." Dirk shifted, tossing his hands behind him on the bed to lean back. "Kankri right?"

Saying his name seemed to snap the boy out of whatever trance he was in. His eyes flicked up, landing on Dirk for seemingly the first time and the blond was able to see they were a dark color, brown maybe? It was hard to tell in the dim light from the lap. But then those eyes flicked away and for a split second, Dirk was pretty damn sure he saw red in the reflecting light.

"You, uh, go to Westwood?" Dirk asked, perking a brow in his attempt to start a conversation. He wasn't exactly keen on just sitting there in silence so he figured they could at least talk.

Kankri shook his head and that was the only answer it seemed Dirk was going to get.

"Look." He let out another sigh. "We can just, you know, talk or whatever." He shrugged, flopping a hand about as he moved to rest all his weight on one hand. "I didn't exactly sign up for this and from the look of it, you didn't either so we can just, you know... sit here."

Kankri's shoulders seemed to relax at his words and those eyes were on the blond once again, the flush still dark over his cheeks. "Talk?" His voice was light, soft, and it made Dirk smile.

"Yeah, sure, why not? Not like we have anything better to do for the next twenty or so minutes. I've never seen you before. Where do you go to school?"

Kankri shifted on his feet, knocking the point of his maroon boot against the carpeted floor. "I am a student at Saint Vince Academy."

Blond eyebrows shot up. "Isn't that the catholic school across town?"

"It is."

The snort that came from Dirk's nose was completely unexpected and when Kankri's eyes widened, Dirk shook his head, a smile tugging at this lips. "Sorry, I just. Ha. You go to catholic school."

"I don't see how that is humorous." Kankri's voice took on a sharp edge and his fingers tightened around his arms, his eyes narrowing.

"No, wait, I didn't mean like that. I just mean, you're in catholic school and you're in a room with me, a proud to be bi-sexual guy, where we are supposed to be playing 30fordirty. It's kind of ironic." Dirk gave him a disarming smile with a shrug. "I'm not making fun of you, just the situation is pretty funny."

Kankri stared at him a moment, his eyes narrowed and in that moment, Dirk could see his eyes were some type of red rust color in the dim light. "Our senses of humor differ."

"Sorry, dude, don't mean to offend." Dirk gave him a warm smile as he kicked a heel against the floor. "So what's a catholic school boy like you doing here? Who invited you?"

"Latula." Kankri answered softly, his eyes shifting away to the floor.

"You know Latula?"

" _You_  know Latula?" Those red-brown eyes were back.

"Well yeah. She's a really rad chick."

"Yes. She's... very nice."

"So she invited you?"

"Yes. It's not the first time she has invited me but I felt, it was about time I agreed."

"So what do you think? Of the party?"

"It's pleasant. Though this was a turn of events I was not expecting." Kankri was back to hugging himself tighter as the situation was brought to light once again.

"I told you, just talk." Dirk reminded him, settling his elbows on his knees as he leaned forward. "How'd your name end up in the jar."

"Mituna, I assume." Kankri's face darkened at the name but then his head titled as he thought. "Or perhaps it was Latula." He tapped a finger against his cheek. "She's been asking me to come lately because there is someone she would like me to meet. Perhaps she thought we would be paired up for this game."

Dirk nodded and slipped a hand to rest against the side of his neck, fingers sliding through short strands of naturally blond hair as he tilted his head at Kankri. "She tryin' to set you up?"

"I believe so."

"With who?"

Kankri shifted his gaze to Dirk, his expression thoughtful. "Cronus Ampora?"

Dark brown eyes widened slightly. "Seriously? She's setting you up with Cronus?"

"Do you know them?"

"Who doesn't?" Dirk let out a breath of a laugh. "Kinda surprised with that match up."

"Why is that?" Kankri took a step forward, his eyes open and innocent and Dirk almost felt a bit bad for having to tell him the truth.

"Well first off, Cronus is a guy."

"I am well aware of that."

A blond brow perked. "Aren't you catholic?"

Dusty cheeks flushed as Kankri straightened up. "I come from a very accepting family."

"No shit." Dirk let out a laugh, his expression amused. "You go to an all boys catholic school and yet you're parents are cool with you being into dudes?"

"My father is a priest." Kankri tilted his face, turning his nose up slightly as he glanced away from Dirk. "He's spent his entire life preaching equality and acceptance. He would be a hypocrite if he did not live his personal life in the same way."

"That's actually really damn awesome. No, Seriously, it is." He continued at the suspicious look Kankri threw him. "I know a lot of people who come from religious families that sure as fuck don't have that luxury. It's really cool that your dad is okay with you being you."

"Well... Yes, it is." Kankri relaxed, a soft smile curling to his plump lips as he took another step toward Dirk. "What was it you wished to say about Cronus, other than the fact that he is male?"

"Oh, Well, he's just. I'm not judging or anything, he's just pretty different. He's kinda known around school as being that guy who will sleep with anyone who asks." Dirk watched as Kankri's face visibly paled. "But, those could just be rumors, you know? It's high school, kids talk and shit. I, personally, don't know him that well. He's in my gym class and from what I can tell he puts on this air that he's hot shit but," he shrugged, "just seems like a weird match to me."

"Latula would not put me with someone who would hurt me." Kankri argued gently.

"No, I agree. She's a cool chick. She wouldn't purposely hurt anyone. She probably knows what she's doing. I'm not saying she doesn't. I'm just..." Dirk trailed off with a shrug.

Kankri nodded, letting his eyes trail over the side of the bed Dirk sat on. "How exactly is this game played?" He asked suddenly, his body relaxing slightly. "I've never heard of it before."

"Eh, well, it's pretty self explanatory. You get locked in a room with someone and you do... things."

"I don't understand."

"Man, Kankri," Dirk rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, "It's just a game teenagers play. It mainly consists of making out from what I know. I've never played it before so I don't really know."

"If you've never played, why are you here now?" Kankri sounded truly curious.

"Because Roxy thought it would be funny to put my name in the jar." He sighed heavily, letting his head drop between his shoulders.

"So... This is not something you do normally? Spend time alone with strangers in a romantic setting?"

"Hell no. I mean, well." Dirk shrugged, feeling awkward all over again. "Not my kinda thing you know?"

"I don't believe I understand the appeal of doing those types of things with a stranger." Kankri admitted softly, a flush coming to his cheeks as he cast a glance over the wall to his right. "I don't entirely understand the appeal of them to begin with but I become more baffled when I think of it with a stranger. I don't wish to sound judgmental toward those who do enjoy it, I just don't understand it."

"You asexual?" The words came out of his mouth without a filter to stop them.

Rust-brown looked at him in confusion. "I'm sorry, I don't know what that is."

"Uh, it means, well basically, you don't have sexual attraction? It varies from person to person. Sexual shit grosses you out or you just don't get turned on by things. I think the drive is still there it's just, not brought on by attraction or something like that."

"Oh. No. I'm not that. At least, I don't believe I am. It's more that I just don't understand the appeal of sexual things. Why do them other than the obvious reasoning of reproduction? And then that brings up the discussion of same-sex relations and that's where I get a bit lost on the reasoning behind doing those types of things."

"Pleasure." Dirk answered, a slight look of disbelief on his face.

"Pardon?" Kankri's cheeks flushed with color as he glanced at Dirk with wide eyes.

"Pleasure, Kan. People do it for pleasure." The blond shook his head as a laugh rumbled up his throat. "Cause it feels good? We're only human you know? So we have sex cause it feels good. It feels nice to be with another person and trust me, sex with another feels a hundred times better than when you do it alone, so people do it."

The blank look on Kankri's face made Dirk sit up straight. "I'm afraid I don't... I don't understand."

"Think of it this way. You know how good it feels to touch yourself?" Dirk could hardly believe he was even having this conversation so openly with a complete stranger who happened to be a really cute and innocent catholic boy who'd probably never been kissed in his life. "Well imagine that but tenfold. Cause having someone  _else_ touch you is a different,  _better_ , pleasure than when you do it yourself. And then there's all the different ways to have sex and I'm pretty sure I don't need to pull out a list for you on that."

Kankri's flush spread to his ears and Dirk found it really hard to keep his smile hidden. "I don't um. I've not-That's not something I have knowledge on."

Dirk perked a brow. "Are we talking about sex or masturbation?"

"The, ehem, second option." His voice was soft and a quick mumble between plump lips as he glanced away.

"No shit. How old are you? What grade are you in?" Dirk asked, suddenly even more curious about the teen standing a few feet away.

"I'm a junior."

"Me too. And you're telling me you've never touched yourself?" He asked in disbelief and when those curls bounced from a nod, he found himself staring at the other. "But... what the hell did you do when he popped up? Cause we're teenage boys, Kan, that's a thing that happens."

"I just let it be."

"How... Okay like, how fucking sheltered are you?"

Rust snapped at him. "What do you mean?"

"Like, you seem to know nothing about how this whole sex thing works and then you don't masturbate?" Dirk sighed as he leaned back on his hands. "That's just sad. I feel bad for your little guy."

Kankri squeezed his thighs together a little tighter and dropped his hands to curl around the hem of his sweater dangling over his crotch. "I'd rather you not think about my penis, please."

Heat flared to Dirk's pale cheeks and he quickly glanced away from the crotch he had totally not been staring at. "I can't believe you just called it your penis."

"That's what it is!"

Dirk chuckled softly, covering his mouth with his hand as he glanced at Kankri from the corner of his eyes. He couldn't imagine those pretty lips saying anything vulgar in their entire existence and that abruptly made heat crackle along his spine.  _Whoa, down boy._  "Most guys call it their dick. I haven't heard it referred to that way since sex ed in middle school. It's the least sexy way to refer to a dick."

"I'm not trying to be sexy." Kankri huffed slightly, his cheeks puffing out as he curled his hands tighter around the hem of his sweater. "I was just making a point."

The blond snorted softly. "Right. I'm not thinking about your  _penis_  and how sad its existence must be since you've ignored his needs."

"What needs?" Kankri ventured softly.

"Dude, we're teenagers. He needs attention. I know your dad is a priest but I think he'd understand if you jacked it every now and then."

Kankri's face seemed to permanently be a lovely shade of red. "I don't think those are things my father needs to know. I also currently share a room with my little brother while his is being renovated thanks to a water leak. Privacy is needed, is it not?"

"That's what bathrooms are for. Everyone does it, Kankri. Seriously. Once we reach that certain age it's just kinda normal to explore and figure your body out, especially since we're still growing and shit. How old is your little brother? I'm sure he'd understand."

"He's nine and I'd rather not reflect these things on him." Kankri sighed softly as he crossed the distance between them and sat on the edge of the bed a good foot away from Dirk.

"Alright so, bathroom. Put on some music, run a shower and just take your time with it. Learn yourself, you know?" He twisted, giving Kankri a soft smile as he faced him. He could hardly believe he was giving masturbation advice to a complete stranger but he'd done weirder things in his life.

"Yes, but how exactly..." Kankri lifted his hands as his ankles tucked together against the bed frame and made interesting motions with his hands. "do you do it?"

"Dude, I'm not telling you how to touch your dick."

Dusty cheeks flared to life, making the freckles on them ever more prominent. "I'm not asking you  _how_. I'm asking... Oh, I don't even know anymore." He dropped his face in his hands.

"It's cool, Kan. You'll figure it out." Dirk reached out a hand but thought better of it and let it curl in his lap. "Just take the time and you'll learn what you like. And remember, everyone does it. You're not weird for doing it. No matter what, I guarantee every person you've met has done it."

Kankri peeked an eye out from between his fingers. "That sounds like peer pressure."

Dirk couldn't help but laugh. "Yup, I'm pressuring you to touch yourself and give your dick the attention he deserves before he falls off from lack of pleasure."

A coy smile tugged at Kankri's lips as he remained mostly hidden in his hands. "Father told me to not listen to peer pressure."

"Pfft. Look, I'm just saying, don't think you're weird for doing it, okay? Everyone does it. It's natural, you know? And hey, it's cool if you  _don't_ want to do it too."

Kankri nodded, letting his hands fold together in his lap as he sat up straight. "What music do you suggest?"

"What kind do you listen to?"

"Classical, typically."

"Whatever gets your juices flowing." Dirk shrugged and moved to lean back on his hands once again. "I've found anything with a good beat works really well. Rhythm is pretty damn nice."

"Do you have suggestions?"

"I've got a playlist." Dirk perked a brow. "You got a phone?"

"Yes?"

"Give me your number. I can send you the list. It's easier to text it." Dirk said as he lifted up slightly to dig into his pants pocket for his phone.

"Oh. Thank you. That would be very nice." Kankri slipped a hand into his front pocket and pulled out his slim phone effortlessly. He passed it to Dirk when the blond held out his hand and he watched patiently as Dirk exchanged their numbers.

"Here." He handed Kankri his red,  _obviously_ , phone back before scrolling through his own to save his new contact. "I'll send you the list later when I have time to go through it."

"That's nice. Thank you very much."

"No problem." Dirk flashed him a smile as he stuffed his phone back in his pocket. "Oh, right." He held his hand out, a corner of his lips turned upward in a soft smirk. "Dirk Strider."

Kankri glanced at Dirk's hand and smiled softly. With the hand not holding his phone in his lap, he grasped onto Dirk's in a firm shake. "Kankri Vantas."

"Nice to meet you, Kankri."

"You as well, Dirk."

Dirk nodded, a smile playing on his lips as their hands separated. They sat in silence for a few minutes but this time, it was a lot less awkward so Dirk didn't really mind it. He rolled his shoulders and went back to leaning back against the bed in a comfortable position. Kankri sat primly on the edge, so close Dirk could touch him if he wanted to, with his knees tucked close together and his hands in his lap.

"Dirk.. May I ask you a question?" Kankri's voice came out a little shaky and when he glanced shyly back at Dirk, the blond found his tongue a little thick in his mouth.

"Sure."

"What did you... Ah." Kankri swallowed hard and shifted his eyes forward, staring at a wall as if he couldn't look at Dirk right then and there. "What did you think? When you saw me? When my name was called."

"Uh."

"You don't have to answer. I'm just, curious I suppose."

"You're asking if I was pleased with my partner?"

"Something... like that." His teeth sunk into his bottom lip to tug on it.

"Shit, Kan." The blond let out an awkward laugh, a hand rubbing along the back of his neck as he glanced away to the lamp on his right. "Uh, what did I think? Honestly?"

"Yes, please do be honest."

"Well, at first I was just kinda ticked off that Roxy dragged me into her little game." Dirk answered honestly, keeping his eyes fixated on the lamp. "And when she called your name, I had no idea who you were. And well, I mean, I wasn't  _dis_ pleased. Like at all. Pretty sure the first thing I thought was, 'holy fuck he's cute'. And then I noticed how tense you were and how awkward and," he shrugged, "I was going to tell you we didn't even have to come back here but you came anyway."

"Why is that?" Kankri shifted, turning to glance at Dirk who really found that lamp interesting. "Telling me we didn't have to come back here, I mean?"

"I'm not exactly keen on making people do things they don't want to do, you know? And you really seemed like you'd rather be anywhere else but stuck in a room with a stranger but you came back here on your own. You obviously didn't want to do what the game is meant to be so I figured, we could at least talk."

"I... I appreciate that, Dirk. Thank you for not pressuring me."

"Be a dick if I pressured you. And hell, we did just spend a good five minutes talking about masturbation so I'm not entirely sure where the line is and when we crossed it at some point."

"Fifteen!" Roxy's voice suddenly called along with a hard knock against the door that startled both of them.

"Has it only been fifteen minutes?" Dirk asked aloud, an awkward laugh coming from his lips as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Dirk." Kankri said the name softly as he leaned forward, trying to get a better look at the blond's face. "You weren't displeased?"

Dark brown shifted away from the lamp and met rust at the hope in that soft voice. "No. Not at all. Did you expect me to be?"

The apples of his cheeks flushed and he quickly glanced away to the hands in his lap. "Well, You're exceptionally handsome, Dirk, and I'm aware we are on two different levels of attractiveness so I thought you might be disappointed."

"I... Whoa what?" Dirk shifted, pulling his bent leg onto the space between them so he could face Kankri fully. "Disappointed? Levels? Kankri, what are you talking about?"

Kankri glanced at him, raising a brow as he used one hand to motion to himself. "I'm average at most while you're... higher than that. I'm not oblivious to how the attractiveness of a person effects daily things in life."

"Okay whoever the fuck told you you're not attractive needs to be shoved into cement." The blond tisked, clicking his tongue against his teeth.

"E-Excuse me?" Kankri turned toward him, surprise written across his face.

"Kan, You're attractive okay. Really damn cute; that's a thing. And uh," dark brown trailed over the others body and they both ended up flushing a dark color as Dirk shifted his eyes to the floor, "you're seriously my type so just stop thinking like that, okay?"

"But I'm not-I mean, I'm not saying I know what you like at all, that's not what I'm trying to say." Kankri pressed, his eyes wide in slight confusion as he rubbed his hand over his thick thigh. "I'm just not what one would consider a standard level of attractiveness."

"Cause you're a little heavier?" Dirk could tell with the way Kankri flinched that he hit the nail right on the head. "Dude, Kan,  _No_." He leaned forward a bit making his knee press into the side of Kankri's thigh. "It's attractive on you. You've got, yeah you've got rounder hips and thighs but that's, attractive? It's sexy, okay, it's sexy and like fuck anyone who says otherwise. People have preferences and you're definitely my preference and holy fuck I can't believe I just said that." Dirk let out a sigh and rubbed a hand over his flushed cheek as he glanced to the floor.

Kankri let out a soft puff of a laugh as he glanced at Dirk, his cheeks just as flushed as the blond's. "Would you have kissed me?"

A flare of heat made its way up Dirk's spine and his heart decided now was the perfect time to find a home in his ear drums. "I'd kiss you in a heartbeat if you let me." He admitted, meeting Kankri's eyes.

"I've... never been kissed before." Kankri mumbled, lowering his eyes to his hands in his lap, fingers curled tightly around his phone.

"That's okay. Kisses happen when they happen you know? You're pretty kissable, so I'm sure it'll happen soon."

"Kissable?"

"Yeah. Your lips, I mean. They uh, yeah." Dirk bit the inside of his cheek as he glanced to the plump pink wonders. "You lick your lips and tug at them with your teeth a lot, did you know that?"

"I... It's a habit I have when I'm nervous."

"I noticed."

"Dirk?"

Dark brown snapped up. "Yeah?"

Casting a shy glance at Dirk from the corner of his eye Kankri dropped the biggest bomb the blond could have ever expected, "Will you kiss me?"

Dirk's throat tightened as his heart pounded hard and he found himself reaching across the small space between them to place his hand gently over Kankri's clenched fists. "Are you, um, Are you sure?"

Kankri nodded firmly. "You've been very kind to me and..." Biting on his bottom lip, he twisted to face Dirk fully the best he could given the position they were sitting in, "I want to."

Holy shit; holy fucking shit this was happening. Dirk swallowed hard and bridged over the space between then, lifting his slightly shaking hand to brush his finger tips over Kankri's cheek. The teen didn't pull away at the touch so Dirk let his palm slide over a round flushed cheek till he could feel the soft curls of thick dark hair against his fingers. He glanced from those luscious plump lips that were still trapped between perfectly white teeth to sparkling eyes that were slightly wide and full of emotion that Dirk couldn't completely read.

"You're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

Well, He didn't need to be told more than that. He tipped forward slightly, checked to make sure Kankri was okay once more and then closed the distance between them, pressing their lips together in a soft kiss. Kankri's eyes closed instinctively but Dirk couldn't look away from the blurred vision of those lovely eyelashes. He pulled back after a few seconds and when Kankri didn't open his eyes, he used the hand cupping Kankri's cheek to tilt the boy's head to the side slightly so he could dip back in. He pressed a little harder this time but still gentle enough that if Kankri wanted to, he could pull away.

But he didn't pull away and when his lips moved to press back into the kiss, Dirk could feel his blood rush with a warmth that made him a little breathless.

They pulled apart again after a moment and when Kankri opened his eyes they were sparkling in a way that made Dirk smile. The blond bumped their noses together, earning a soft smile in return and he was sure that was it. A few soft kisses and that was enough for Kankri cause hell, the boy had never been kissed before and- Shit, Dirk took his first kiss. As that realization settled over the blond, Kankri reached forward to grip his free hand in Dirk's collar and tug him a bit closer, planting their lips together once again.

A soft breath came from Dirk's nose as he pressed against Kankri's lips, enjoying the soft feel of them against his own. For a boy who'd never been kissed, he sure was good at it. Their lips pulled apart with a soft smacking sound before they pressed together again. Over and over, one soft kiss after another. They'd move occasionally, to adjust the angle and pressure but Dirk's hand remained over Kankri's cheek and Kankri's hand clutched onto Dirk's collar, keeping him in place. It was innocent, really and pretty tame compared to Dirks standards but it was  _amazing_.

The feel of Kankri's lips against his own made his blood rush and his heart pound. The soft breaths they shared and the way Kankri leaned into him was a hell of a lot more romantic than Dirk was used to. And he  _liked_ it. Screw all the rushing and clawing and grabbing at each other he was used to.  _This_ was incredible.  _This_ was the kind of kiss he'd always been waiting for without knowing it.

Tentatively, Kankri's hand shifted, soft fingertips slipping up Dirk's neck and into short strands of blond hair. Dirk didn't object, just leaned his head into the touch as their lips moved together, catching in all the right places and making his stomach tingle. That hand continued upwards until Kankri had a fistful of longer blond hair and using that leverage, he pushed Dirk closer, deepening their kisses even more.

Dirk let out a grunt of approval and found his own fingers twisting in curls of silky dark hair, his thumb brushing absentmindedly over the apple of Kankri's cheek as he dipped in for another kiss. If this was making out, Dirk wanted to do it more often. All the time really. Cause this was a hell of a lot better than what he was used to, if his heart had anything to say about it.

"Time's up!" The loud bang against the door nearly sent them flying apart and though they jumped and their lips parted, they didn't release one another.

"Yeah, okay." Dirk called toward the door, rolling his eyes as he turned back to Kankri. "Time's up." He repeated.

Kankri nodded and with a soft noise of acknowledgment he closed the distance between them, capturing Dirk's lips once more in a kiss that the blond would probably think about for a long time. Neither realized they didn't even bother to pull apart until there was more loud knocking on the door.

"Come on cuties!" Roxy called. "Put your clothes back on and come out here, there's other people in line!"

Dirk let out a soft growl as he pulled away from Kankri. "You know it takes some people more than thirty minutes right?!" That earned him a high pitched squeal from Roxy and a series of laughter that made him instantly regret the words he spoke.

"We should go." Kankri smiled tenderly as he released Dirk and moved to his feet, shifting to tuck his phone back in his pocket.

"Assholes." The blond grumbled as he moved to his feet as well. "Ah, Kan." He reached out to flatten the bit of dark hair he had managed to set out of place and of course he became caught up in how much taller than the other he was and how Kankri had to tilt his head backwards to look at up him. It wasn't that noticeable when they were sitting down but now, Dirk was sure he could tuck Kankri into his arms and wrap the boy up completely. And he wanted to do that. Really damn badly.

"Dirk." Kankri's smile was soft as he reached up to wrap his fingers around Dirk's wrist, his hand paused in flattening the others hair.

Fuck it. Dirk dipped down, his back arching and his knees bending so he could reach the lips that lifted up to meet his. Kankri felt so good against him; fit so well against him.

"I'm going to come in there in a second!" Roxy teased through a fit of giggles.

"Oh my maker, Roxy, calm the fuck down." Dirk rolled his eyes, a smile on his lips as he pulled away from Kankri. "I'll call you, okay?"

Kankri nodded, slipping his hands back around himself in a hug. "I hope you do."

"You know we could-"

"Cover your dicks boys!" The door abruptly opened, hitting the wall with a bang as Roxy stood there, her legs apart and her arm out wide as she had a hand covering her eyes.

"We're not naked, babe." Dirk couldn't help but laugh at her while Kankri distanced himself from the blond, a deep flush on his cheeks.

"Oh." She took her hand from her eyes and glanced between the two of them, her face lighting up at the flush on Kankri's face. "Good! Dirky." She reached forward and grabbed onto his arm, tugging him toward the door. "Now now, you must tell Roxy all about your adventures in Vantas land, Latula tells me he's a cutie pie and a virgin."

"Ah, Roxy." Dirk paled slightly as he was dragged away and glanced over his shoulder, seeing Kankri exit the room with his eyes focused on the ground. Roxy continued to ramble on as she pulled him down the hallway and finally, Kankri raised his eyes so they could meet. Dirk gave him a soft smile that was returned and that was enough for the blond. He patted his pocket that held his phone a bit dramatically so Kankri could see and the brunette nodded, resting a hand over his pocket that held his phone.

"So, how was he, Dirky?" Roxy demanded, tugging the taller blond around a corner and taking Kankri out of sight.

Dirk let out a disappointed sigh and followed along obediently. "You know I don't kiss and tell, Rox."

"Oh!" She squealed, her face lighting up like she just received the best Christmas present. "So you  _did_ kiss him!"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to!" Her nails dug into his arm as she tugged on it, a bright smile on her painted lips. "Oh Dirk, that's so cute! He's a cutie, isn't he? When Latula told me he was coming and I saw him and she wanted to set him up with Cronus, I just knew you had to meet him."

"So you planned this." Dirk stated flatly.

"Well no! I don't rig the jar. The jar is a sacred item and has brought many couples together! And now this!"

"We're not a couple, Rox."

"But you  _could_ be." Roxy's eyes sparkled as she came to a stop and moved in front of Dirk, a serious look crossing her features. "Please tell me you got his number."

A confidant little smirk came over Dirk's lips and out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a still blushing Kankri being pulled along by Mituna with a laughing Latula not far behind them. "Of course I got his number."

"Yay!" She jumped up, wrapping her arms around Dirk's neck and so neither of them fell, he wrapped his arms around her waist to hold her up.

" _Great_  party, Rox."

"I know, right?"

**Author's Note:**

> What's that? A series you say? Me? Another series? Why ever would I-
> 
> Yes. Yes I am. A series. Not a series that's going to be updated on a schedule but I have a 15 year span of time planned out for these idiots and you can bet your sweet ass I want to write it. 
> 
> I just want to say that I absolutely ADORE equality seeking(but not oppressing) sexually naive and sheltered Kankri. The blushy blushy thing gets better in time, trust me. Right now, they're just dorky awkward teenagers and I love them. 
> 
> Well thank you very much for reading! I would really appreciate it if you clicked that kudo button there and also if you took the time to leave me a comment! Even if it's something simple like, "that was cute" I'll be super happy! Feedback gives us writers life, you know.
> 
> ~Addy~


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